 ChinaboundPremium
join:2002-12-21
Antioch, IL
kudos:3 | reply to Mele20
Re: Pet Forum (revisited) said by Mele20: I resent strongly that you choose to belittle my mother's feelings. You say that those who don't have children cannot understand your personal feelings about losing a child. Well, you have demonstrated a lack of understanding or decency about persons like my mother or ANYONE who loves their pet as they would their child and, in fact, considers their pet to be their child. First of all, I didn't focus on your mom, Miss Drama. And you shouldn't speak for her - ask her what would bother her more, your death, or Ebony's.
I will ask you as I asked someone in an PM though....are you a parent? If any parent comes on this board that has lost a human child and pet, and then claims that the death of their pet was just as devastating as the loss of their child, I won't believe them.
said by Mele20 :
.....please don't tell those of us who have that we cannot know our own feelings or know how totally devastating it is to lose a beloved pet or a child. IT IS THE SAME, or even greater loss, for those of us who truly love our pets.
Spoken as a true non-parent. Shame on you.
said by Mele20 :
I don't think you truly love your pets. You may think you do but with the lack of sensitivity you just demonstrated in your remarks, I doubt that you love your pets deeply. They are not one with you and since you have not been blessed to experience that feeling and that much love....
You don't know what you're talking about. I could "resent" this comment as you did one of mine, but I don't. |
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 mers2Premium,MVM
join:2004-03-20
USA
kudos:8 | Chinabound, each of us feels and deals with grief differently. Some of us do consider our pets our children - especially those whose children are grown - and their loss is devastating. Non pet owners definitely don't understand us, but it's hard when those who have pets don't and judge us for feeling the way we do.
That's one reason a pet forum would good. Posting the loss of a pet in one of the other forums often leads to comments that do further damage to an already hurting individual.
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"Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget." - G. Randolf
Team Discovery
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Mele20Premium
join:2001-06-05
Hilo, HI
kudos:4 | reply to Chinabound
"Miss Drama"? I'd say you are the one with all the drama. YOU CHOSE, not I, to belittle a lot of folks who love their pets deeply. You didn't focus on my mom because you didn't know about her and you just want to be argumentative anyway. You started this, not I.
Yes, I am a parent and I stand by what I have said here. I don't lie in my posts here. You are free to believe that you know my feelings better than I do if you can't bear to think that some folks really, really love their pets as their own children. To try and place BLAME on me (the shame crap you tried to lay on me) makes me feel sorry for your children as you are extremely judgmental person and your kids are probably already suffering because of your attitude. I had a father like you so I know whereof I speak.
You simply don't understand and with your closemindedness I don't think you ever will. I have a good friend like you and she thinks she loves her pets but her love is LIMITED when it comes to her pets and she, too, like you is incapable of understanding how devasting it is to lose a pet. She just doesn't get it although she says she feels horrible and sad, etc when a pet dies. She ran over her pet in her driveway also and she was the one with all the drama that you accuse me of having. She moaned and yelled and beat her breast and was sooo upset and cried a lot and then she got another a pet right away (because she needed it to kill rats) and could not understand how I could not do that. She couldn't understand how I had to go to Hospice for pet bereavement meetings yet she claims that she has very deep love for her pets...that stay out of doors and wouldn't have been run over if she kept her cat inside where a cat belongs..but she loves her pets deeply, uh huh. She would never dream of having her pet sleep next to her every night and have her pet inside? Of course not. I think you and she would get along just great as you could tell each other how much you love your pets but you keep them at an emotional distance. They are not part of you and that is the difference between you and I. You are arrogant to judge me as you have instead of just dropping it since you are incapable of understanding.
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When governments fear people, there is liberty. When the people fear the government, there is tyranny. Thomas Jefferson |
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 JohnnyPremium
join:2001-06-27
Atlanta, GA
kudos:2 | reply to Chinabound
I will ask you as I asked someone in an PM though....are you a parent? If any parent comes on this board that has lost a human child and pet, and then claims that the death of their pet was just as devastating as the loss of their child, I won't believe them.
Absolutely. It's absurd to compare the loss of a pet to the loss of a child. Every dog or cat owner knows the animal won't outlive them. If they got a call a 3AM about their 14-year old being raped and murdered, you betcha that's going to cause an order of magnitude more suffering than a dog getting run over - I don't care which dog it is. For those without children, losing the pet that they have allowed themselves to believe is the same as a child might SEEM to be the worst thing in the world, but losing a child is much much worse. |
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 onDvineDon't Litter. Spay-Neuter.Premium
join:2005-01-29
So. CA, USA
kudos:9 | reply to Chinabound
Re: Pet Forum (revisited) said by Chinabound:... After many months, and many tears, we got through it. ... That's the grieving process, whether departed loved ones are our children, spouses, parents, siblings, friends, or pets. We may not be able to "imagine going on" after they're "taken away" but suicide is the only way to avoid it.
... I do not believe that any parent would feel that way (so, I do not believe you at all, onDvine) ... I'm a parent and a grandparent. You don't know me at all, Chinabound  ; implying I'm dishonest because my perspective differs from yours is inappropriate.
Now, it would be nice to return to the subject you rudely derailed. |
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onDvineDon't Litter. Spay-Neuter.Premium
join:2005-01-29
So. CA, USA
kudos:9 | reply to Johnny
said by Johnny:... It's absurd to compare the loss of a pet to the loss of a child. ... That comparison was never made. mers2 said (emphasis mine), "The pain is like losing one of your children."
Individuals experience pain differently. Therefore nobody can accurately assess the degree or judge the validity of another's feelings. |
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 fatnesssubtleJanitor
join:2000-11-17
fishing
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| reply to Maccawolf
This thread has run a long time and turned partly into a chat thread, a pet thread, and lately an argument thread. That's understandable, people were waiting for an answer.
There are multiple forums on this site where pet threads are made and are welcomed --- local chat forums, general questions, the members-only social forums, the Helix forum, etc. With adequate homes like that where people can discuss pets and pet issues I don't think a separate pet forum is needed; I think the need is adequately met now.
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this is serious |
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